Tuesday, December 14, 2010

How NOT to realize whats right in front of

Here's an example of what Not  to do, to save you time.

After reading Jack Rabbit Factor, I did as it said. I wrote my statement, I visualized, I believed it to be true, but life continued and I lost my conviction. I began to back pedal. I had an intermittent website cookie business and My cookie sales fell completely off. I began to think that Leslie had sold me the "Kool-Aid".  I spent several months more pitying myself and dwelling in my same thought patterns. I closed down my website. I stopped interacting with people and completely closed myself off to the outside world. I kept only my computer.

I began to be more sensitive with my boyfriend again. We are at a very tenuous time. The other night he again threw me to the curb. Only this time I wasnt going without a fight. I grabbed the phone and called my brother. Poor man lives 200 miles away, but sweet as he is, he said I'm on my way. Again as I sit on the curb, I cannot think about whats ahead of me. I cannot be excited about the freedom in front of me. I can only think of the strain I will cause my brother and his new bride. I also can't stop thinking about losing what little I had. I again acquiesce. I called my brother who was now within 50 miles of my house to turn around and go home. My boyfriend has promised to send him gas money and help me put everything away. Once I got off the phone with my brother, my boyfriend went back in the house and left me to tote all of my belongings, broken pieces and all, back into the house on my own. He then began a chant of  "you wouldn't have had to do this had you not been so angry! Anger rules you!"

I have to say I believed at the time staying was the better of the choices. Why bring someone else into my misery? The days after this pass. I went on with my existence. Back to toughing it out alone.
I then received a copy of the movie "The Secret". I watched it and was again tempted to believe that I might have another purpose in this life. I went to sleep that night saying in my mind "I need 5,000. dollars by the end of the month". Over and over again I repeated this in my mind. I knew that it was a good enough amount to get me out of my desperate situation and not be a burden on anyone. Again and again, until I fell asleep, I kept saying "I need 5,000 by the end of the month".

On that night of August 17th into the 18th something happened. I cannot explain it, but I woke up the next morning very nervous. This doesn't happen to me. I am a very quiet morning person. I woke up, did some chores and stayed to myself, for fear of a problem with my boyfriend. I didn't know what was up, but it was something. I remembered  from the movie to only put out the vibration of what I did want and not what I didn't want. So I did. I stayed in my bedroom all morning to maintain any peace there was going to be. My boyfriend was having a particularly horrible day. He was angry, said he didn't feel right and that life was not being good to him that day. I said nothing. When he left for work I warily ventured out into the living room, and saw his telephone on the coffee table. I suddenly felt a pit in my stomach. I became immediately overaught with anxiety! Oh no! I am going to pay for this! This was somehow going to be blamed on me. I somehow caused him to be distracted so that he forgot his phone. I was sick! My stomach was so tied in knots, it consumed me.

Just then my phone rang. It was a 310 area code. I didn't know the number, but answered the phone anyway. I have to admit, my attitude at the time stunk, to say the least. The caller on the other end asked if this was Cookie Memories? My response was "Cookie Memories" is closed. The caller hung up.
My boyfriend came to get his phone without incident.

I began to calm down. Upon calming I realized something. The number for my Cookie company is no longer listed on google, and the phone number wasnt on my Facebook page. I no longer had a webpage. How did this person get my number? I googled the area code and found it was a California area code. Los Angeles, Hollywood, Malibu. Oh no!!! But, how did they get my number? Curiously, I called the number and the answering machine said, "Social Capital Films"! Can you picture the look on my face? My mouth is wide open, and I cannot speak. I clumsily left a very apologetic message. Sent a follow-up email, and resolved that I did all that I could to salvage this. I then googled the "film" company and as it turns out it was a very substantial film company. For those of you who don't know a lot about the "Speciality Cookie Business". I make Custom Cookies. Cookies that are used as Favors, Event Centerpieces and the like.   When I first got in the business, that was my cous de gras. I wanted to land a Movie or Event that would put me on the map.
A friend in California did several of these for Showtime and made millions after that in follow-up business. 
It catapulted her to a Professional Level!
I just sat in awe. I immediately thought of the story of the man on the roof! The man is in a flood and boat after boat comes by but he refrains and says he's waiting for God. The man dies and upon reaching heaven He asks God why he wasnt saved and God replies "How many more boats did you want me to send???" I AM THIS GUY !!! The universe sends me exactly what I asked for and I hung up the phone?!?!? Are you kidding me????  Is this some Cosmic Joke??
Ok, what have we learned?
All I'm saying is this: Listen to the signs. Be positive. Ask for what you want, and KNOW that you DESERVE what you ask for.
Some things are meant to be, whether you can see how it will happen or not!
Ask for it, see what happens !!!!!!

More tomorrow...............

If you could have anything you want, ANYTHING, what would it be???
**Comment me and let me know

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